Mothers are often minimized or left out of Christmas movies altogether, this is true. Most Christmas movies you look forward to feature middle-aged white men finding their inner child. This is the way major Christmas releases go. Oh, there are plenty of Christmas movies that star women, but the vast majority are motherless romances that compensate for their lack of quality by being completely unrelatable. Most of these have all the staying power of a housefly in a toilet eddy [which, coincidently, is also how I think of most of them].
As mothers tend to be the backbone of any quality Christmas celebration, the lack-of-focus on screen Christmas seems quite an oversight. Hence, kudos to Oh. What. Fun. for identifying an underserved subject in the most common movie theme in movies. Yes, you deserve praise for pointing out that mothers ought to have their Christmas day in the sun. Perhaps, then, it is fitting that in our hemisphere, the sun barely comes out at Christmas. And for all the good intentions, Oh. What. Fun. isn’t. On the scale of quality Christmas offerings, it is far closer to “toilet bowl eddy” than “It’s A Wonderful Life.”
All Claire (Michelle Pfieffer) wants for Christmas is for her children to enter her in some sort of Mothers recognition contest eminating from her favorite TV distraction, The Zazzy Tims show. Of course, the little assholes can’t be bothered. Channing (Felicity Jones), Taylor (Chloë Grace Moretz), Sammy (Dominic Sessa) can’t be bothered; they have their own issues. The latter two will both experience a significant-other crisis this holiday season. Channing is already there, of course; she’s married to Jason Schwartzman. Yeeeesh. Meanwhile, Claire’s husband Nick (Denis Leary) is a useless tool on his own. His entire Christmas consists of assembling some sort of Barbie Dream House that no child will ever play with.
OK, film, lay it on me. Kids and husband are zeroes? Show me why Claire deserves to be talk show honored … oh, you didn’t think that far ahead. You just went with the kids and husband are right ingrates. OK, we see that. Is it enough? Well, not when Claire’s main holiday focus is outdoing frenemy neighbor Jeanne (Joan Chen). Geez, how many Christmas movies have I seen a stupid man try to outdo his neighbor for gift-giving or Christmas 
cheer? There must be a dozen; it’s a terrible plot and makes me hate everyone in the film. How is this any different?
The “plot” culminates in the ultimate bit of stupidity when Claire picks the exact wrong moment to pay attention to Jeanne and gets stranded Home Alone style when the family attends some fool dance competition.
It would have been better if Claire had sabotaged the house for them a la Kevin in Home Alone. No such luck; she abandons the ingrates, pulling a Thelma & Louise, as if one-upping their ingratitude. Congrats, movie, now I do hate everybody. Well, not really, but do you know how hard you have to work for me not to enjoy Michelle Pfieffer?! Pretty damn hard.
Oh. What. Fun. did try. I will give it that much. Some holiday films don’t try at all. I’m lookin’ at you, A Merry Little Ex-Mas. Oh. What. Fun. gave us several possible laughs in a different universe included, but not limited to: Nick struggling and failing to assemble a doll house that really should have taken about 15 minutes maximum, Taylor bringing home a girlfriend who goes by “DJ Sweatpants,” and Claire herself stealing 
a novelty seven-wick candle then going on a low-speed police chase that is quickly abandoned … so as soon as she exits the mall illegally we don’t care anymore if she stole something?! Oh well, the point is, you tried, movie. You tried.
You failed. Let’s be clear.
But you tried. Maybe call the sequel: “Robin Lays an Egg.”
The theme here that Claire wants respect just doesn’t resonate because she gives none. Respect is a two-way street, even in the mob. I found this film a tried and desperate attempt to out some big(ger) names in a holiday offering and crossing fingers. And like a dead Rudolph, it just didn’t fly.
There once was a mother named Claire
Who understood Christmas wasn’t fair
For her fam, the jerks
Gave her the works
And how I wanted oh so badly to care
Rated PG-13, 107 Minutes
Director: Michael Showalter
Writer: Chandler Baker, Michael Showalter
Genre: Holiday dreck
Type of being most likely to enjoy this film: Mothers … maybe?
Type of being least likely to enjoy this film: People who long for decent Christmas movies
