If we do nothing, our planet will die. Buddy, don’t I know it. The problem is that in our reality, the people in charge are actively working with the forces that would happily destroy all life on Earth. “The astrophage gave me a very nice present that I cannot tell you about. Very big present. Very important present. For me, and me alone, because they recognize how important I am. It also came with an award and medal, so I’m going to let astrophage do what it wants to the sun. Solar and wind power are stupid, anyway. All we need is beautiful, clean coal.”
Yeah, I’m sorry if this fictional future apocalypse doesn’t distract you enough from our present non-fiction apocalypse. I don’t think it is supposed to, anyway. It’s no coincidence horror and dystopia are having their finest hours in our movie houses these days; art reflects reality, and, today, boy-oh-boy, does it do some quality reflectin’.
Grace (Ryan Gosling) wakes up in a spacecraft with an 11-year-old beard and memory issues. He doesn’t know where he is; he doesn’t know how he got there. Oh, hey, that isn’t our sun, is it? Look at that – both his crewmates are dead. Gee, I hope they weren’t necessary; that would be alarming. This is one elaborate prank, huh?
Speaking of elaborate pranks, our sun is dying. Or at least that’s the plot of the film. I cannot stress enough how much our current President and his toadies would fail this exam. They failed COVID, and the deaths were front-and-center in that case. Trump even got COVID, and he still blew it. Trying to tell him that our sun is dying would require FOX News announcing it every day, and adding, “Only our really smart President can save us…” And even then, Trump would look to monetize the catastrophe long before he’d do anything positive. But I digress.
The point is the sun is dying. Grace, a high school science teacher by trade, is now the sole hope of humanity, our Project Hail Mary if you will. Our sun is not alone in this tragedy.
Astrophage, a microscopic parasite of sorts, has claimed many suns in our galaxy … except one. Grace has the task of figuring out why, coming up with a solution, and sending the result back to Earth before all life on our planet dies.
Simple huh?
Turns out, Grace isn’t as alone as he seems, for, check it out, there’s another spaceship out there. And it didn’t come from Earth. And I so want to spoil the next part, but I cannot because it gives away too much of the plot. Suffice to say, there will be memes galore that come from this particular film. There is no way Project Hail Mary will not be reflected significantly in our cultural awareness. This is the role that we are going to remember Ryan Gosling for. Not La La Land. Not Drive. Not The Notebook. Project Hail Mary. When 
Gosling has his “In Memorium” moment at the Oscars 50, 60, 70 years from now, there will be a shot of Project Hail Mary. And deservedly so; this is Gosling’s finest acting; he is asked to run a gamut here from cowardly to heroic, and he’s asked to do so either alone or with a green screen for roughly 80% of the picture.
If I have any quibble with this spectacular adaptation by directors Phil Lord, Christopher Miller and writer Drew Goddard of Andy Weir’s magnificent book, it’s that there wasn’t enough science. I can forgive this because, let’s face it, who wants MORE science in a 2.5 hour movie? (I mean, besides me.) This is one of those cases where, like Silence of the Lambs, the book and the movie are both awesome, and should be appreciated separately. Project Hail Mary is one of my favorite watches in many, many moons. It’s uplifting despite the dire tone; it’s educational without being condescending; it’s funny despite being morbid; and it has the best relationship you’ll see in a movie in years even though Ryan Gosling is acting by himself for most of the film.
This is a film I am not going to forget when my “Best of 2026” comes out. Project Hail Mary is among the top 100 films of all time. Not gonna qualify that.
There once was a science teacher named Grace
Whom the Earth could easily replace
Which was great, cuz you see
To save humanity
They had to shoot him right up into space
Rated PG-13, 156 Minutes
Director: Phil Lord, Christopher Miller [Which one directed Rocky?]
Writer: Drew Goddard, Andy Weir
Genre: Our screwed future
Type of being most likely to enjoy this film: Anybody with a soft spot for alien life
Type of being least likely to enjoy this film: Hmmmm, well …. MAGA hates science, aliens, elitists, wry humor, and long-term thinking. I’m gonna say “MAGA”
