I’ve been waiting for films like this. Films about homosexual characters in which the central issue is not homosexuality. Been waiting a while, too. Yes, yes, have your gay cowboy sex movie; wake me when there are gay cowboys who talk about shelter or food or gun fighting or aliens or something other than playing with their lassoes.
Love is Strange is, essentially, about a gay couple Ben (John Lithgow) and George (Alfred Molina) going through pain that any of us could and might feel. It has -almost- nothing to do with being gay. At the start of the film, they get married. Yay! Happy! Smiles! And then George is fired from his job as chorale director of a Catholic High School. It was OK for him to be openly gay for a few decades, sure, but married! Hey, pal, the Church don’t go for that. Yes, this is a plot point essentially about sexual discrimination. What follows isn’t. Ben & George can no longer afford their place. They have to move. And moving them in tandem is a problem in NYC where space is a rare commodity.
See, now that’s equality. When it’s all about the gay? All you’re doing is separating. Love is Strange is about relatives and housing and being forcibly split from your partner. Homosexuals are entitled to just the same amount of indignance and discomfort as everybody else.
Speaking of equality, er, I mean equity, what is it with you jokers? You’ve been a double-income-no-kids aging couple for, literally, decades and you have nothing put away?! Shame on you.
Ben has to live with his niece (Marisa Tomei), her husband (Darren E. Burrows) and their son (Charlie Tahan). Gay great uncle in your bunk bed? Seriously not cool. George gets to live with the party cops downstairs. At the heart of Love is Strange is not an exploration of bigotry, but an exploration of the title. What is love? Why is it strange? Why is it cool to have a gay uncle ten blocks uptown, but not-so-cool in your living 
room? “Love means never having to say you’re sorry.” That’s crap. Wake me when love means you can’t say, “no” to a septuagenarian moving into your 2 BR 800 sq. ft. flat. That, my friends, is true love.
In the middle of Act II, George has had enough and races across town just to be with Ben for a day, an hour. The reunion, and especially the embrace, is so touching it seems shocking we’ve kept these two away. I’m ashamed to admit that until this point I kinda said, “they’re men; they’ll live.” When the two finally meet back up again, the moment is so real it seems hideous to have ever nurtured such a thought. Would you separate grandma and grandpa in this fashion? Of course not.
I can see the appeal of Love is Strange to New York City denizens — I mean, the ideal solution is just moving the pair to a sister’s house in Poughkeepsie. But that means uprooting lives, friendships, habits. You wouldn’t dare suggest that kind of flexibility in any elderly couple whether they live in Soho or rural Indiana. If you can imagine growing old, this film is a true gem; one of my favorites of the year.
A gay couple left in limbo
Maneuvers as adroitly as Dumbo
It’s a family affair
To see who might care
For the men, it’s the Fogie Mambo
Rated R, 94 Minutes
D: Ira Sachs
W: Ira Sachs, Mauricio Zacharias
Genre: Things old people fear
Type of person most likely to enjoy this film: Have you a conscience?
Type of person least likely to enjoy this film: “The more, the merrier!”
