Reviews

Professor Marston and the Wonder Women

Even those looking for a college experience to “expand horizons” probably don’t expect to end up in a threesome with a prof and his hot wife. Of course, that’s just a guess. Hollywood, you’re not exactly allaying the fears of education-skeptical conservatives, are you? And where was the class where “Teaching Assistant” was code for “bisexual partner?” Was that in the syllabus? I must have missed that day.

In the 1920s, Professor William Moulton Marston (Luke Evans) taught psychology at Harvard to, apparently, 95% female classes. This suited the prof and his loose ethics just fine. [I have no problem with free love between -or even among- consenting adults; I will, however, continue to have a problem with professors using classrooms as p-date forums.] His wife Elizabeth (Rebecca Hall) sat in on most of the classes which is only important in that at any given time, Professor Marston was looking to score with at least ten of the people in his audience. One he pegged specifically for teacher petting was blonde naïf Olive Byrne (Bella Heathcote).

Boy, how do you get over that awkward hurdle from, “Olive, I’d like you to help grade some papers” to “Olive, I’d like you to stay after class and clap my eraser?” Alternatively, Elizabeth is a pissed-off PhD in her own right (Rebecca Hall was marvelous casting here) and fully well knows her hubby’s proclivity to assign “extra credit,” as it were. She’s going monitor the new T.& A. er, that’s “T.A.” situation very carefully. And this is when the film starts getting’ good.

The problem with having three highly-intelligent and promiscuous beings in close proximity is that honesty becomes a rare commodity. Hence, the prof and his wife actually invent the lie detector to discover hidden truths and as a prelude to the “golden lasso” gimmick Professor Marston will eventually adorn his brainchild with. Yes, before long, this libidinous psychology professor will become comic book author, turning his sexual comprehension into the superheroine Wonder Woman. This is after the three all take up common residence and bedroom.

Professor Marston and the Wonder Women is not for the racy impaired. While no cinephile would mistake this film for porn, it ain’t exactly The Spongebob Movie, either. KnowwhatI’msayin’? And, you’re not gonna want to screen this thing for Uncle MAGA, either. It’s quite a Wonder when this film gets going. Have you ever pondered what people see in cosplay? Watch the scenes in which Olive transforms into Wonder Woman. Ditto for relationship trios; movies don’t tend to study said subject with any vigor or adoration.

For all the excitement about learning about something you may not know or shining a dignified light on potentially disturbing subject matter (for some), PM&tWW is far from a perfect film. I didn’t have any problem with the movie’s attitude of “your bigotry is the problem here, not our lifestyle,” but for the professor and his wife to tag-team Olive-the-student still seems wrong to me, no matter open her eyes were. The film never accounts for that perspective. In addition, there are several unnecessary redundancies in the screenplay: When you learn somebody wants to have sex with you, you can only be surprised about that fact once. The shock wears off when “discovered” anew.

I see this film as not only educational, but as an innuendo spoilsport. I imagine a close-minded bully trying to pick on Professor Marston:

“Hey, Wonder Woman guy! What’s the lasso for? So you can tie each other up? Snicker. Snicker. Har-har.”
“Well, yes, actually. Thank you for asking. My wife and I enjoy bondage sex.”
(Bully looks frustrated, continues)
“OK, OK, so what about women torturing each other in your comic book? Are you into lesbian sex? Guffaw.”
“Why, you’ve only skimmed the surface, young man … I enjoy lesbian sex, threesomes, ‘torture,’ costumes, toys, all sorts of ‘deviant’ sexual activity.”
(Bully gives up) “Aw, screw you. I’m gonna go make fun of Batman’s tights.”

And once upon a time, so would I.

In defiance of society
Prof Marston, his wife and Betty
Enjoyed their cocoon
Masked in cartoon
For some, it’s even better with three

Rated R, 108 Minutes
Director: Angela Robinson
Writer: Angela Robinson
Genre: Geez, that got racy!
Type of being most likely to enjoy this film: Cosplay and “deviant sex” enthusiasts
Type of being least likely to enjoy this film: Kim Davis

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