So how do you like your Elijah Wood? Do you prefer the curly-haired teen hobbit version, or would prefer a goth Penguin-looking butler with a terrible combover? If the latter appeals, boy, have I got a movie for you. The Toxic Avenger simply screams, “art direction doesn’t have to mean ‘pretty!’ “ And that goes for makeup and set design as well, because none of this picture is terribly pretty, but it still had some moments, nonetheless.
Winston (Peter Dinklage) is a sad sack. Milquetoast, pushover, jellyfish. Is “snowflake” still a term being used today? Not sure, but Winston is about as assertive as a bowl of unset jello. He’s a janitor at the evil BTH corporation. And he’s dying. First, however, we have to establish how pathetic his life is before he learn about his health. He’s a dwarf in more ways than just stature. His wife died of cancer not long ago and he seems to have zero relationship with his stepson, Wade (Jacob Tremblay). We see early on that he isn’t the hero type or the assertive father type. He’s barely an employable type. And now he’s dying of a brain disease which his healthcare won’t cover.
Meanwhile, Bob Garbinger (Kevin Bacon) is CEO of BTH, a health company that, quite ironically pours toxic sludge into the local lake on a daily basis. And when anybody gets close to exposing the harmful pollutants, Bob sics his trollish brother Fritz (Wood) and a punk band, The Killer Nutz. Personally, I love the idea of a punk band that doubles as goon enforcers. Who says you can’t have it all?
The film established that Bob is a Grade A dick when it callously shoves its meek hero in Bob’s face. Offering a modern “Please Sir, I want some more,” Winston humbles himself before Bob, only to get tossed on his ass. Yadda, yadda, yadda, Winston ends up in sludge lake where the lethal chemicals turn him into The Toxic Avenger. Sure, 
he’s green now with part of his brain sticking out of his head, but, wow, he’s pretty indestructible. What kind of weapon should a green indestructible dwarf have? Well, new Winston dips his mop (literal, not figurative) in sludge, creating something on the order of a light saber, only far more disgusting.
There’s a bunch a humor I appreciated in this film. Most of it is dark. Parts of the city once given historical labels are now known as “Ye Olde Shithead District”, ”Depressing Outskirts”, and “The Hellscape”. In the middle of the film, a cop tries to find order in the chaos, eventually giving up with, “Ok, fuck it. It’s a mob.” And for every genuine laugh, there are two counts of infusion with gorilla’s blood or toxic acid urine. This is not a pretty film. But you’ll remember it, at least.
The Toxic Avenger seemed a decent waste of time if you can get by the gross. Warning: there’s a lot of gross. I’m not going to pretend this was a great film, and there are several good reasons I didn’t see it until 2026, but it was a fun ride nonetheless for the “revenge at all costs” crowd.
There once was a dwarf named Winston
Who was not a very fortunate one
His life was ending, for heaven’s sake
When he went swimming in Toxic Lake
Now he’s green and immortal, how fun!
Rated R, 102 Minutes
Director: Macon Blair
Writer: Macon Blair, Lloyd Kaufman, Joe Ritter
Genre: Strong stomach films
Type of being most likely to enjoy this film: “Revenge at all costs”
Type of being least likely to enjoy this film: “No, sometimes the cure is worse than the disease”
