Successfully assassinated two hours of my life.
Reviews
The Smurfs
Muthersmurfing cocksmurfers.
The Help
Viola Davis and Octavia Spencer are all almost certain locks for Oscar nominations – I have no problem with this, nor should you.
Contagion
Wow. This thing has spread like … wildfire? Cancer? Mayonnaise? No, that’s not it. Just wait. I’ll get it.
Abduction
Only thing abducted here was the admission price.
Thor
Thor—oughly disappointing.
Drive
Uh oh. A phone call. Ryan Gosling might have to [Gasp!] speak words.
Sarah’s Key
Finally. An answer to ‘what’s a velodrome?’ and ‘what would it look like if there were actually people in it?’
Rise of the Planet of the Apes
Dr. James Franco. Calling DOCTOR James Franco. Please report to fiction, STAT!
The Change-Up
Threw a curve and went for the screwball. Result? A walk out of the theater.